Josh Groban…errr…Ben F, the winemaker, went on a one-on-one date with Ashley. They held hands as they strolled to a Thai taxi headed for romance. The taxi brought them to an outdoor market where Ben daydreamed that he was walking around with his girlfriend, only dropping Ashley’s hand out of necessity. While they sat in front of a temple, unable to kiss out of respect for Thai culture, they mentally kissed (literally closing their eyes while simultaneously imagining a kiss) with a spoken intention to turn that thought into reality later in the evening. After some dinner and deep conversation, Ben received a rose and that long-awaited kiss while entertained by Thai dancers and fire breathers.
I’m glad Ashley had her moment, because after that, Chaing Mai was all downhill. Since Ashley was fully-clothed all of last episode, and because I’m fairly certain ABC wrote a clause into her contract stating that she has to show her midriff 25% of the time, she flaunted her bod in a sports bra while Thai boxing. It was also her opportunity to check out the merchandise, as all of the men were expected to strip down as well. I think the boys should always be shirtless…it was nice.
After three hours of Thai boxing training, it was time to fight. Ashley loaded the boys into a truck that took them to a ring in the middle of town. Two Thai men were sparring, and the boys started to mess themselves out of fear.
Fight 1: Blake the Dentist vs. Luke the Texan. They didn’t play nice. Serious punches to the head and face…my stomach was churning. Thank goodness they were wearing protective head gear. Blake won, which was probably good because he could fix the teeth he bashed out of Luke’s head.
Fight 2: Mickey the restaurateur vs. J.P., the smallest guy there. After getting in a few good hits, Mickey unleashed a devil in J.P., who boxed his little heart out.
Fight 3: Ames the Pacifist vs. Ryan the Solar Energy Cutie. Ames admitted to never throwing a punch in his life. Harvard and Yale are much too civilized for that. So Ames just bounced around in his pink shorts while Ryan gave him hit after hit to the head. One mild concussion later, Ryan took home gold and Ames took home a souvenir hospital bracelet.
Fight 4: Nick (Willy Wonka) vs. Constantine (Josh Groban #2), the big boys. We don’t know what happened in this fight because Ashley was too worried about Ames, who was completely out of it, to watch.
Ashley had the paramedics take Ames to the hospital, where he says they diagnosed him as completely love sick (clever even with a concussion!). I’m sure Ryan was worried about what he did to Ames (although he didn’t really express his regret)…but he was probably more worried about how it affected his chances for a rose. When Ames made his way back to the festivities that evening, he was still a little dizzy, disoriented and at a loss for words due to his head trauma. But he definitely scored a pity rose as a reward for his suffering.
Unlike Ames, Blake the Dentist had his best night ever. Blake expressed concern to Ashley that they haven’t had much time together and that he’s not sure she’s even attracted to him (p.s. She HAS to be because he is HOT HOT HOT). For this, Blake received reassurance that Ashley sees potential in him, a rose…and a kiss.
Ben C. (the flash mob dance guy) and William (the bad joke jerk from Columbus) drew the shorts straws and got a two-on-one date. Recall the rules…two men, one rose…one stays, one goes. So William, who has already goofed up by offending Ashley with bad jokes, decided to impress Ashley by telling her that Ben C. is looking forward to online dating back home (something I’m sure he said in jest back at the villa). William then told Ashley that Ben’s not the only one who is no longer interested in her. Great job, William. Way to make an insecure girl feel swell…again! Unfortunately, Ashley believed William, no questions asked, and immediately sent Ben home. Where Ben made a mistake is in not fighting for Ashley to hear otherwise, because I truly believe he wanted to stay…for the “right” reasons.
William was rewarded for being a nark and rode off on an elephant with Ashley. My only hope was that he wouldn’t get a rose either. Last week on vacation, I was swimming in the Atlantic with my seven-year-old niece. She kept saying, “I wished for this Bethie, I wished for this.” She was referring to a calm day at sea. Lucky for me, my wish came true, too and Ashley told William that it’s too late, the spark is gone. Buh bye! Hooray!
Apparently Ashley also doesn’t need a chocolate river or little orange men running through her house, so she sent Willy Wonka home, too. Willy (Nick) was devastated, but not to worry…he’s the candy man. He’ll mix it with love and make the world taste good for another lucky lady.
Despite making the right choices this week, Ashley’s just not in this with her whole heart. Unable to let go of her feelings for Bentley (girl…I know how it feels!), Ashley confided to Chris Harrison that she can’t stop thinking about him. Recall that Bentley left the show with a “dot dot dot,” cruel and unusual punishment, leaving Ashley with a need for closure. The “dot, dot, dot” won’t allow Ashley to move forward and she has asked Chris Harrison if she can speak to Bentley.
So, while we thought Bentley was coming back this week, ABC was just teasing us. We'll have to wait another week, when, based on previews, it seems Bentley will be more than happy to accept an all expenses paid trip to Thailand to pull on Ashley’s heart strings a little more. Let’s hope she can get over this guy before she loses her chance with someone who is actually worthy of her love.
Until next week,
Beth
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